Another Murder of a Neighbour

It turns out that a man I share a key with (to our nine-room compound) was shot a killed by police in town a week ago. He was a thief in a gang and was planning to rob a shop in town somewhere, however the police knew about it and went beforehand. The gang had guns and so the police shot 2 of the members - one being my neighboure, Gaspar.
His wife, family and friends had no idea that he was a thief and the police only managed to inform them of his death on Monday. His wife had a baby 3 weeks ago, their first.
So, only having known him by sight and a few greetings as we passed each other around the homes, I wasn't too upset but I feel enormously sorry for his wife and baby.
I was quite uncomfortable on Monday evening listening to the wailing and crying right outside my door. It is common for EVERYONE to visit, even if you didn't know the deceased or the family. So the mourners split into 2 groups, male and female. The women wail and cook and talk inside the home while the men play cards and talk outside... until well after midnight. The next day it begins again. There are some things I just can't get involved in no matter how hard I gear myself up... I just would know what to say (in Swahili?) or how to just be around people I didn't know for hours on end in that strange circumstance, so I just went to bed. Simon on the other hand gets really involve... almost excited byt the whole thing and is gone for hours or days.
I really miss home and want to leave but now I'm beginning to think that once I'm home I'll really miss Tanzania... because I'm so attached to some of the people here... especially the children. When will I ever find the balance.